At least four points are worth noting from this book:
First, when it comes to couple relationships, sex is an important aspect. There’s nothing wrong with that. It’s the way God intended for things to work. But God has placed certain boundaries on the sexual. It is foolish for people to believe that couples forming and nurturing their relationships will not have sexual thoughts and feelings. The Song of Solomon reminds us that God has known this, planned it that way and has spoken to the issue. Faithful people will pay attention to what God has said and keep within the boundaries of what God has said is proper.
Second, you will notice in the Song of Solomon that “looks” play an important role in the attraction between the sexes – both to men and women. It is important that after marriage, both husband and wife understand that, and seek remain attractive to their spouse.
Third, though looks are important, husbands and wives see one another differently from the way they see others. The woman of Shulam did not think she was as pretty or as cultured compared to the queens of Solomon’s harem (1:5-6). But Solomon saw her with different eyes. In every successful marriage, the wife must know from her husband that he sees her differently from the way he sees other women – different even from the way she sees herself – and that he loves what he sees in her. The wife views her husband differently from the way she views other men – and she loves what she sees in him.
Finally, notice that Solomon and his bride communicate to each other their appreciation for one another. In modern relationships, pride often gets in the way of doing this, but successful marriages as God intended are relationships where husbands and wives continually communicate how they value how they feel about each another to each other, and they do so in positive ways.